Are you WrAstlin'?

Today's sermon was especially good. We are doing a series about Wrestling with God. I missed last week since we were in Destin but part two really struck a chord in my heart. Lately I have been struggling with a lot of resentment with those around me, myself, and God due to the situation in our household. I won't go into it because honestly it gets really old.

The sermon was from Jeremiah 20:7-18. Brady talked about how in a relationship your goal isn't to have NO conflict because that's just not reality but instead how to navigate through conflict that is inevitably going to come. He basically said it's okay to wrestle with God sometimes. If you are in an intimate relationship with God there WILL be a times where you will get frustrated, feel disappointed or wronged, and not understand and it is good to be honest and voice frustrations with him just as you would with a human being. God wants us to come to him and be 1o0% honest with him. God desires that relationship with us so much. A lot of times we can let reverence get in the way. Don't get me wrong we need to be reverent to the King of Kings but when you are in intimate relationship with him the reverence will come. If you are going to wrestle with God be ready for a response because He WILL give one. The ironic thing is that we complain to God (i did ____ for you, i served and gave up ___ and you let ___ happen to me??) do we not use God in the same way(protect me from this, provide this for me) we are accusing him of using us? It is alright to come to God with all of our hearts, the good, bad, ugly. The beauty is that God remains unchanged, loving, and present in our lives even when we feel like he's not there. He promises us that he will NEVER leave or forsake us NO. MATTER. WHAT. We have the opportunity to have be in a relationship, and intimate relationship with the creator of the universe, the one who spoke the world into being!! That is incredible to be and almost too much to grasp.

All that said i have been halfway honest with the Lord about how i feel very frustrated that he is allowing the things that are taking place to take place and I have to be completely and utterly honest with him. He is my father and I need to start treating him like he is instead of trying to take control of my own life. I can't do this alone, the burden in too heavy for me to lift. I am going to choose this day to LET GO!

Lord, maker of all things, forgive me for not being honest with you in every aspect of my being. I want to know you like I've never known you before. I want to be in the most intimate relationship with you. Help me to stop running to anything and everything else that won't solve anything when I have troubles and instead run with steadfastness toward you, the one who controls all of this mess we call the world. Thank you for being patient with me in all my hardheadedness and doubting you when I do. Deep clean my heart, mind, and soul. Make me new. Help me to feed my hunger for you before anything else. I praise you for who you are to me!